Babyproofing the House Without Losing Your Mind: A Dad’s Checklist

By Drew April 13, 2026 4 min read

Owen started crawling at seven months. He was pulling himself up at eight. By nine months he had figured out that the baby gate was a puzzle and he was the solution. We had babyproofed the house, but we had babyproofed it for the baby he was three weeks ago, not the baby he was now.

Here’s the thing nobody tells you about babyproofing: you don’t do it once. You do it in waves, and each wave has a window of about six to eight weeks before your kid finds the next thing to put in their mouth or fall off of. The good news is that the basics are mostly cheap, mostly easy, and mostly skippable from those overpriced “complete” babyproofing kits the algorithm shows you.

This is what I actually installed, what I skipped, and the order I did it in.

The two-list approach

I split babyproofing into two lists: the “do this before they’re mobile” list and the “do this the week they’re mobile” list. The first list you can knock out in a Saturday afternoon. The second one you’ll iterate on for months.

Pre-mobile (do this around month 5–6)

The week they go mobile

What I bought and didn’t need

The “complete” babyproofing kits on Amazon include a lot of stuff that turns into landfill. Things I bought and never used:

Two things I didn’t think of until it mattered

1. The dishwasher. When you load it, the bottom rack has knives pointing up. We now load knives blade-down, every time, the second they go in. This is a free fix that took us one near-miss to learn.

2. The dog’s water bowl. Owen tried to drink from it at ten months. He also tried to climb into it. The bowl now lives behind a baby gate during the day, and the dog gives me looks. The dog will recover.

The medicine cabinet rule

Every parenting book mentions this and I dismissed it until our pediatrician said it again. The single biggest source of accidental poisoning in toddlers isn’t cleaning supplies — it’s medication. Specifically grandparents’ medication, in pill organizers, on the kitchen counter, when they visit.

The fix is one sentence: “Hey, while you’re here, can we put any pills up high?” Do it the moment they walk in. Nobody has ever been offended by this. Everyone has been a little embarrassed they didn’t think of it.

The order I’d actually do it in

If I were starting over from a non-babyproofed house, this is the sequence:

  1. Anchor the furniture (one Saturday morning, $40 in straps).
  2. Outlet covers and cord shorteners (one hour).
  3. “Yes” drawer in the kitchen (10 minutes).
  4. Stair gates installed before they crawl, not after (you’ll need them for at least 18 months).
  5. Magnetic locks on the chemicals, toilet lock on the bathroom (one hour with a drill).
  6. Corner bumpers on whatever made you wince when you watched them pull up the first time.

Total: maybe four hours of work, maybe $150 of supplies. Probably less.

The temptation is to overdo it — to lock every cabinet and bumper every edge and turn your living room into a padded cell. Don’t. Kids learn what’s safe by exploring what isn’t, and the goal isn’t a hazard-free house. The goal is a house where the worst thing they can get into is the Tupperware drawer.

Owen pulled the Tupperware drawer out three times today. He’s thrilled every time. That’s the win condition.


Related reading: The Ultimate Baby Registry Checklist for Dads (2026) covers the gear you actually need before the baby arrives. Preparing for Baby covers the room setup. This post is the sequel for when they start moving.

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